When you click through to a Green Splatter article, you expect intense, high-octane, hard-hitting “journalism.” Today, however, I’ve got some mega-bad news: You won’t be getting any of that.
Huckfaces.
You might see that written as one word or two, but the meaning is the same: A huckface is the face a disc golfer makes mid-throw. Lame ones look no different from a person doing anything else in life. Great ones disform, disfigure and ooze awesome – those are the ones we want to see.
A few examples quickly come to mind:
- Ricky Wysocki – Pardon the potty talk, but it looks like he’s dropping a SockiBomb.
- Thomas Gilbert – Mouth open. Tongue out. It sounds dirty, but it’s Tommy’s huckface.
- David Wiggins Jr. – The face might not change much, but he’ll let out a yelp – count it.
Heck, you might have a GREAT one and not even know it …
Bust out that iPhone of yours to find out. Simply scroll through the endless form viddies you forced your patient wife to record for you to see what your moneymaker’s doing mid-huck.
If you like what you see, take to Instagram with a screenshot – instant engagement.
And if you don’t, here’s how to mold your mug properly:
1. Get Audible
It works for Venus and Serena Williams …
Why not you?
If facial malformation isn’t your strong suit, this’ll be your saving grace. Instead of artificially furrowing that brow of yours, simply let out a massive yell, grunt or moan at the time the disc leaves your hand. It’s cool, but it’ll also intimidate. Beware of courtesy violations, though …
You’ve been warned.
2. ‘Be Like Mike’
You remember the Gatorade commercial from the early 90s, right?
It was good advice then for young, dehydrated, inner-city hoopers …
Years later, it’s STILL good advice for disc golfers.
Stick that tongue out while you tug on a max-weight Star Destroyer. Sure, it might only travel 275 feet, but with your mouth’s main muscular organ in full swing, nobody’ll notice. Playing good is easier when you feel good. And you know what feels good? The tongue, dummy …
Relax, we’re talking disc golf.
3. Tighten … everything
Seriously, you want your face looking like it’s in a wind tunnel:
- Squint those eyes.
- Pursed lips are a plus.
- Cheek bones must be visible.
- Neck tendons should look like cello strings.
This is one of the few times in our sport when a roaring headwind helps.
Listen, dialing in a quality huckface won’t improve your game …
But bystanders will think you’re special – there’s something to be said for that.
Have anything to add? Take to Twitter to let us know – we’ll actually (for real) get back to you.
Editor’s Suggestions:
- Disc golf: How to not throw nose-up
- There are many ways to (successfully) play disc golf
- Disc golf: This shot will make (or break) your next tournament
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