5 of the most embarrassing things you can do in disc golf

I might not be great at disc golf – far from it, in fact. But when it comes to making a complete fool of myself, I alone reign supreme. To compile this list, I spoke with a few frisbee-flinging buddies. I took to a couple of online forums, as well. But the bulk of these icky insights? 

That’s right …

• Been there.
• Done that.
• Doing it.

Let’s dive in.

1. Nailing the first-available tree after a play-through request

There’s nothing wrong with asking to play through. But when given permission, it’s your job to not dilly-dally. To demand fast play and then play slowly yourself is unforgivable. Smashing the first-available tree off the tee when making the pass might not be intentional, but it certainly doesn’t inspire confidence in the snail-paced group’s decision to let you play through.

Everything’s harder with an audience.

This specific mistake will redden the cheeks.

2. Doing something dumb while parkgoers stop to watch

Speaking of audiences …

This one’s rough.

This is almost exclusively a moment that takes place on disc golf courses at public parks. In my experience, random parkgoers are infatuated with disc golfers – not just any disc golfers, though. More specifically, with those who have TONS of gear: 25-plus discs, a baby stroller, etc.

You know …

You.

For these passersby, given the professional-grade setup you’re working with, for as unwarranted as it likely is, their knee-jerk reaction is to believe you’re brilliant – that you’re God’s gift to the world of disc golf. As a result, they’ll stop to watch you throw to see what you’re made of. 

Proceed to launch an accidental “throwler,” however, and instead of growing the sport like you’re supposed to, inadvertently, you’ll have solidified it as a punchline in somebody’s mind.

That’s pressure.

That’s embarrassing.

3. Nearly crushing someone (or straight-up doing it)

Want to shatter the little mental fortitude you have left?

Nail somebody with a golf disc. Or, get terrifyingly close to doing it – that works, too. Once you’ve verified the victim is okay, the brain starts to whisper all kinds of nasty things …

One of them?

“Your game’s a threat to public safety.”

Obviously, that’s not true. But at least once, it was. Making matters worse, you never know when an untimely griplock will strike again. Sadly, that ish stays with you for the long haul. A grown man (or woman) nearly ending a human life with a child’s toy has that effect on people.

4. Letting down your doubles partner on the green

Over and over (and over) again.

From an audience of many to an audience of one …

Your doubles partner.

Frequently, doubles teams are built on ability. One good guy. One not-so-good guy. This makes for fun, competitive play. That is, unless you’re unable to contribute in any way, shape or form.

Can’t throw 400-plus feet?

Forgivable.

Can’t draw metal from 15 feet on the green? Also, forgivable. But your partner’s back is gonna hurt like mad from carrying your sorry butt up and down the course all day. Tragically, this isn’t a single, isolated incident that puts shame on your name. Far worse, it’s 18 brutal holes of them.

THIS pain takes serious time to subside.

Enjoy the yips.

5. Displaying a lack of athleticism on the teepad

I’ve been intentionally vague with this one.

Few lay claim to Bo Jackson levels of athleticism, especially in a sport as sedentary as disc golf. How this truth manifests itself differs from golfer to golfer. For some, it’s a hideous huckface. For others, it’s slipping off the front of the teepad. And for the unluckiest of the lot, it’s a propensity to audibly break wind (fluff) during a backswing when effort’s exerted.

There’s simply no coming back from that last one …

Don’t try.

* Honorable Mention: Attempting a roller when you have no business doing so is bad.

No, you don’t need thick skin to disc golf …

But it doesn’t hurt.

Happy humiliation-free hucking.

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